Philosophy Bro summarizes Martin Heidegger’s “Being and Time”

Philosophy Bro:

Philosophy lost its way a long fucking time ago. They treat ‘being’ like some trivial thing, instead of the most important fucking question of our time, the one that matters most of all. What does it mean to be? Plato ignored it and went about his merry fucking way, and now philosophy is useless. We don’t even know what it takes for something to exist. What makes a thing a thing? What are the criteria for being? Of course, the only way to get to Being itself is through beings, things that are, which is inconvenient as shit but just the way it is. Fortunately, we are beings who can understand Being, the Dasein.

At this point, you’re either a bit confused or you’ve begun diagramming the uses of the word ‘Being’. Good call, but I hope you brought tons of colored pencils and a good sharpener, or you’re fucked. The truth is, the single word ‘being’ just wasn’t meant to bear as heavy a load as this project puts on it. So think of ‘Being’, the essential thing we’re trying to get at, like a Party, and think of ‘to be’, the verb, as ‘to rage’. Now, there are lots of people at this party - chairs, trees, pretty much everything that is. Where is this Party? In the world, which we’ll call the ‘house’. And who do we know who rages the hardest? That’s right, fucking Bros, that’s who. They’re the Dasein at this party, the partiers who rage with awareness and understanding. Turns out, Dasein being is a lot like a Bro raging, and Dasein understanding Being is a lot like Bros understanding the Party. There, isn’t that better?